A Girl, a cat and a cattle rustler!


So am just here in the office trying very hard to be productive. I have filled an entire page with the organization’s (not UN) rubber stamp. I’ve picked a book, “Mind wide open”; should make for fascinating reading but i would rather much have preferred “Mind shut like completely shut”. It’s been raining for the last week in Mombasa and i do not perform well in this kind of weather; not me- am built for hot weather!

My ear is itching, the kind of itch that makes me want to put a needle inside. I think a fly entered my ear, or a mosquito, a bed bug…no, can’t be a bed bug, bugs are persona non grata in my house.

Oh, my house. Let me tell you about my house. Actually, it’s not my house; it belongs to my landlady. The landlady is not mine like mine mine to love and to cherish blah blah blah. She is mine to receive a part of my monthly salo every 5th of the month without fail.

I once got late on my rent, that was last year October. She sent her son to put another padlock in MY HOUSE. That was totally uncalled for and very uncool. I paid her that evening and she was all smiles, she even gave me mahamri and beans. I was tempted to ask for tea and a glass of ice cold water to go with it…….her daughter found me receiving the mahamri and she looked at me like something the cat brought in. She is not even cute, her daughter!

Talking of cats, wansa pon a time when i was a small uncircumcised boy, we had a cat. She was called Janet. Si i told you my granny had a habit of naming all the animals in our homestead, all with the exception of the chicken. Now that i think about it i think she was hated KFC, my granny.

Janet our cat had given birth like 47 times i guess. I was just a boy, i think the older members of my family ate the kittens, sold them, auctioned them or all the above because i never saw the kittens for long after their birth.

Jungle, my uncle jungle is capable of many things and i think he knows what happened to the kittens. I miss him so much; he has such a lovely heart. He would have made a good pope.

Btw, have you ever noticed how animals are kind to kids? I used to pull Janet’s tail from under the granary and i used to enjoy it. As a parent she understood, she just looked at me blankly. Our shamba boy, an uncircumsiced boy called Mwangi once tried that and Janet scratched him. I think he died later of mad cat disease.

We once had another shamba boy from Tanzania, he used to teach my bro and i how to trap wild guinea fowl. I think he used to trap and eat rats while we were not with him. If he is alive today i think he might be a cattle rustler.

Goodness, it’s so boring in office. Our watchman wants a salary increment yet he’s been doing more sleeping than guarding. My body is aching and my saliva tastes like carbonated water. The internet seems to be taking a siesta and downloads are taking Methuselah ages to complete.

I miss her by the way, my Zamzam. She is the sweet chic, the smiling hijabi who made me….no, coerced me to watch Nikita endless times. She knows it word by word all the way from season 1. I love her to bits!

If your woman adores Nikita, please enrol for Muay Thai boxing classes coz eish just got real. Ok, that’s my post for today.

Am sleeping, wake me up when September comes!

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