Nyeri High: Dreams, kicks and a weird Nurse.


Last night i dreamt about two buddies of mine, true Nyeri High rock and rollers i did time with between ’97 to 2000. I have had previous dreams about Nyeri High but this one’s specific clarity was astounding.

Mostly if i had a dream about high school it was always about failing Maths and i swear these were terrible nightmares where i was supposed to be sitting my math final exam the next day and i had done zero revision.

In reality the final exam itself was a nightmare, we did math paper one and two within the first week and in my entire high school life this was the most trying moment. I think i wasn’t created for Algebra, neither was it created for me; the only thing i seemed to master to a minor degree was the formula, deriving an answer from that formula was totally impossible.

So in paper one I filled it a couple of formulas and in paper two i drew a few graphs and that was it, i left the rest to the mercies of the poor chaps who would mark it. I just hoped one of them would be from my village and he would show some love by giving me a good grade and not talk about it at home.

As you might imagine, i was totally thrilled when the week ended, everyone was and after 1600 hours on Friday of the first week of KCSE there was no candidate doing revision in class. We were all down field having a blast, even Kevin and Massimo who were the brightest chaps in school.

I had the recurring dream about flopping in math for several years after i left Nyeri High. I had no idea it would haunt me that much. Well, yes i had put a new definition to failing math but haunting me was a devastatingly mean thing to do.

In last night’s dream i saw my good pal Mutua Mulwa and Francis Macharia. Allow me to impose my nostalgia on you for just a moment here guys…..

I was walking from class and met Mutua near the chapel. Am not certain where he was coming from, may have been from the Dining Hall to secure himself some potatoes or “special diet”, It wasn’t revealed in my dream. Now, Mutua is a really tall fellow, he used to tower above us breathing all the freshest air from Mount Kenya as if we, the abridged versions of the human race did not deserve it.

Now i meet him near the chapel and for some reason he is breathing down on me pushing me against the hedge. I could smell Aquafresh toothpaste on him and he is looking down on me from his specs; he seemed to be pissed off at something, didn’t tell me what but i kind of felt he had a bone to pick with me. it surprised me coz i had known him since form one, this guy was a good fellow, the kind of fellow who wouldn’t kill a mosquito even if it stung him with Ebola.

Hold on to that for just a second.

If there was any bone to pick, it should have been the other way round, me jumping and down trying to breath UP his face. There was this one weekend right outside our chill spot near Twiga Dormitory (the grassy patch where you could catch a whiff of the sanitation block), we had started a silly game, si you the “bendings” eish where you get kicked on your ass if you bend? Mutua tricked me into standing from my lying position and he took advantage of my forgetfulness to kick my ass like it was a rugby ball, i swear Humphrey Kayange would have been awed by that kick.

I could have screamed, should have screamed but in an instant i convinced myself that i shan’t do so for doing so would make me the laughing stock of the entire school. I had already had the unfortunate incidence of a brat in a mini skirt from Thunguma girls dissing me in front of the entire drama troupe and it wasn’t pleasant. I took the kick like a man, like i deserved it even if i didn’t!

It was painful, Mutua, very painful, and you know your boot was curved out of Buffalo skin. I had to go see the school nurse after that, not because of the kick but for heart burn pills which Wang’ondu issued out like candy. My move to the dispensary was however misconstrued by all as a bid to get medication coz of the kick, perhaps to get my ass checked up for internal bleeding or fractures! I tried to tell them beans gave me heart burn but no one believed me.

Back to the dream, we start laughing with Mutua, reminiscing better days in Kavau. We did high fives and laughed a lot as we headed to the Dining Hall using the pathway between Mathenge Hall and Ndovu dormitory. As we were approaching the DH, we met Francis leaving Kifaru one, a dorm which had gained famed for reasons i will not state here, reasons to do with a number, number seven specifically!

We were not sure what Francis was doing there; if i recall correctly his dorm was Chui not Kifaru, and he had a cup of porridge which was odd coz in Kavau we never had porridge. We got into kawaida banter with him as we went down a flight of stairs to the DH.

The Principal was there with a guy called Mwangi who was the shopkeeper at our time. During those days Mwangi’s name was synonymous with bread. When you see Mwangi you were pretty certain bread and “ngumu” was in the vicinity.
They, the principal and Mwangi were chatting animatedly. A huge guy who used to work in the kitchen was hovering around serving them tea in aluminium kettles, same stuff we used to grab from the tea and food trolley in the dining hall. I remember most of the kettles were broke and the DH tables naturally drank more tea than we did!

Then in the middle of their banter, Principal turns to the three of us, we were dressed in full school uniform, and says, “UUUUUUh, check it out, we got royalty in the house!” am not making this eish up man, it happened in dream, i never make up my dreams!

Why don’t you guys come over some time and give the boys a lecture,” that was the principal sipping on some tea. I wondered how he could stand the “muhuha” which if i remember correctly never had a taste a mile close to tea. It was just something concocted specifically for high school boys, neither tea nor cocoa, just a liquid aptly called “muhuha”!

I mean it would be a great thing telling the boys how education has made you who you are,” he added.
I don’t recall other things in my dream, i however remember the three of us, Mutua, Francis and I eating some food all alone and i wondering why the entire school was hating on us.

Or was it because of the “royalty”? i remember “royals” were not the most liked guys in Kavau, especially by chaps from Nyeri!

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